The cigarette mystery

There is someone smoking in my work bathroom! This would not even be a mystery if I weren't the ONLY woman working for this company.
Yes, there is 1 count em' ONE women's restroom here and some crappy little smoking man is going in there for a cigarette at break time.
I have personal hygiene stuff in there which now smells like the mattress at a cheap motel.
Once, when I took the kids to California we got stuck in Winnemucca and the kids and I slept on two of the most smoke saturated mattresses in the world. It was so gross. You could almost see the smoke coming up out of the bed when someone moved, like big clouds of brown yuck.
The shower spat brown water at me for the first few seconds and I could tell that this hotel room did not get many over-night guests. And that I should have toughed it out for a few more miles and got a non-smokers room... ANYWHERE else.
That's how my bathroom smells right now.
There are 3 restrooms for men here in this building. There are 2 more in the other building. There are 5 giant bay doors (all open) to go outside and smoke in the shop. And we are talking a lot closer to where anyone might be working than my tiny little water closet. In fact, you have to come through at least 2 separate doors to get to my bathroom.
It states on the door in bold carved writing "WOMEN". It has a picture of a woman for those employees who can't read. AND a brail note in case you're blind with the need to pee.
You can wash your hands, use the toilet, and open the door at the same time in my bathroom. And my grandkids go in there when we clean at night. Now it stinks, and that smell just won't go away.
I'll catch him and crush all his cigarettes.

Did you mean Bunny?

I was surfing the internet for a good pix for my desktop and discovered there are 3 things I really hate about searching for stuff online.

1. I hate when Windows interupts my search to ask me if I really wanted to do whatever I asked the internet for.

2. I double hate when the darn keyboard skips to a random spot in my typing and just puts some random character in, or worse yet skips to searching for my typo. Did I just say typo? Yes, TYPO. I make a typographical error and the computer smart ass police ask me "Did you mean" whatever I really meant.

3. I triple hate pop ups. Want a new litte emoticon? No, or else I would be typing "emoticons", not "picture of bunny". Would you like to meet singles in your town? No, or else you would be a different search engine... Lookalike Brad Pitt men over 55 or something.

I have a secret lawn mower

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Dakota is here for the summer and yesterday he went outside to "secretly" mow the grass for me. The big green pile of clippings all over the sidewalk gave it away. There is a swath about 4 feet wide and 2 feet long which is now a quarter inch high surrounded by 30 square feet of tall grass. It looks like he chewed it off in other spots. Maybe he hired a goat? Anyway today Joshua brought me his lawn mower to do it with. Dakota was using a weed whacker (and the goat).
Next week I have an adjuster coming to see me to get life insurance. I am also filling out my will and my living will soon.
Tobi asked me to do these things.